So, in case you weren't sure if I am a crappy mom or not, your suspicion on the matter can officially be confirmed by the fact, that up until a few days ago, Thing 1 was still using a pacifier. Yep. There. I said it. Out loud. Well, sort of. My deep, dark secret out for the entire blogging world to know. My almost four-year-old still uses a binki.
I knew I wasn't doing my kid any favors by allowing the binki, but you know, it's just one of those things that aren't great for your kids, but you let them have it anyways. Kinda like letting them watch 'Yo Gabba, Gabba', drink only chocolate milk, and have Cinnamon toast crunch for breakfast everyday. You know it's not the best for them, but they love it, so you give it to them anyways. Well, doctors, dentists, my brothers, pretty much everyone that knew, was telling me to get that kid off the paci. I mean, it's not like he had it during the day or anything. (I'm not that horrible) Just at night. And naps. Pretty much only in his bed while he was sleeping. Hence the name: "nigh, nigh". And oh how this messed up his teeth. Total paci smile. Big ole gap between his top and bottom teeth that I'll be paying thousands of dollars later to fix. Yay for me. Sucks for him.
Yeah, so I knew it wasn't right that a 3 year old still had a binki, but what cha gonna do? I mean, really what it comes down to is laziness. No surprise there. I know I'm lazy. I'll admit it. I'd much rather sit and watch a good reality show than go hiking. So sue me. Anyways. . .There was always a vacation, or a plane ride or something coming up that we needed those darn pacis for. And honestly? I'd heard such nightmares about kids having them taken away, that I just thought it would be easier if he had them forever. I mean, it's not like he's going to go off to college with them right? I really thought the kid would have outgrown them by now all on his own. That way I wouldn't have to be the mean mom. Yeah, not so much.
So, I thought up this plan. I told him that 4 year olds don't have pacis. And that if he wanted to get any presents on his birthday he needed to throw the pacis away FOREVER. And you want to know his reaction? He said, "Okay mom. Big boys don't have paci's. They are for babies." UhHH, What? No screaming, or whining or anything? Wow. Well, sure he says that he's fine with it now, but we'll see how he acts once the day finally arrives.
So, I'd been talking this up for a good month or so. To prepare myself, as much as him, and then finally the day arrived. The night before his birthday. And I was really geared up. Ready for a fight. Ready to remind him of the presents that would await him. Ready for his whining and crying and his big to-do.
And he did. He cried for a total of two and a half minutes. Are you kidding me? Then he went to sleep and hasn't asked or thought about his pacis since. Seriously. I. should. have. done. this. ages. ago. All that mommy guilt about havin the only three-year old alive still on the binki. Embarrassing. And for what? Heck, I woulda taken him to the toy store a year ago, if I'd known how easy it woulda been to bribe him off of his binki addiction.
Yeah. Still mom of the year. I'm proud to say that I'm not above bribing. That's good parenting right? Hey, at least he's off the paci. One crappy parenting issue at a time please. Remember I'm lazy. Oh, and happy birthday Thing 1. I love you, and your wacked-up-paci-teeth-smile.
4 comments:
Well, he should lose his teeth anyway, right? Isn't that what happens to kids? I wouldn't know since I never listened to all that child development mumbo jumbo.
Glad it went well!
I had a blanket for quite a while and I don't see much of a difference.
Attachments are hard to kick for humans. Wouldn't it be nice if they were still simple things like binki's and blankets? I'm sure when he grows up and cries about a broken heart it will hurt worse for you than taking away the binki.
I guess everything is relative.
Happy 3rd year, Thing 1. You have a great mom.
I did the same thing with my now 4 year old. I put off the horrible fit that I was sure would erupt if the binky went away. It was right around when he was three that I decided it had to go. I sewed it into a sort of I Spy bag... clear vinyl on oneside so he could still see it and have it as a comfort object, just not IN his mouth. And he wanted nothing to do with it at all. Never cried, never asked for it. It was just gone. My daughter, however, who is now 6, still told me up until a year ago that she missed her binky because it made falling asleep at night so much easier. Poor kid.
I'm a slacker mom too. Anna still has hers. I didn't want to take it away before we moved, and then didn't want to do it once we moved. All of this crazy transition must need a paci right? Well it made it worse. It used to be just a bed time/nap time thing. She wants it ALL the time now! I need to stop it, but I haven't. Because it's just easier for me to let her have it. I just need to do it. But sometimes as mothers we build things up in our heads too much. Expecting the worst. I hear too many horror stories and I'm just a natural worry wort.
Take tonight for instance. I have stressed about getting a babysitter for my primary meeting all week. Thinking how awful it's going to be because she's never had a babysitter besides grandmas ever. I come home expecting a, "She cried for a half an hour..." but I got a, "She didn't even cry" Oh. She didn't miss me? I stressed out and made a big deal about this for nothing? She probably had more fun playing with someone new. And to think I almost brought her with me to save her the trauma.
Now that I've made my own blog post in your comments, I should probably conclude in saying Congratulations Amy! Well done. Thank you for inspiring other slacker moms like myself.
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