So, yeah, my kids need a serious lesson in tact. And manners. And knowing when to keep their traps shut.
Me: (sitting quietly eating my lunch, and minding my own business.)
Thing1: (at the top of his lungs) Look at that old lady over there! She has lots of wrinkles and gray hair. Is she going to die soon?!
Me: (slouching down as to not be seen, while my face turns bright red, and whisper-yelling like any good mother would) We do NOT say things like that. You know better!
But I have to be honest and say that I was laughing on the inside. Hysterically. Where does he come up with this stuff?
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
OPEN LETTER PART 2
Dear MM,
You suck!
But you don't win. After further thought on the subject, I've decided you can have the nightime wakings. It's by far, hands down, the worst part of mothering anyhow. Waking up all groggy and desperatly tired, wishing you were still asleep. Yeah, you can have those crappy night time wakings. I can live without 'em. I can't say though, that Hubs isn't going to be a little more pissed at you from now on, but as for me, I'm over it.
Amy
8:30 a.m. (the same day)
You suck!
But you don't win. After further thought on the subject, I've decided you can have the nightime wakings. It's by far, hands down, the worst part of mothering anyhow. Waking up all groggy and desperatly tired, wishing you were still asleep. Yeah, you can have those crappy night time wakings. I can live without 'em. I can't say though, that Hubs isn't going to be a little more pissed at you from now on, but as for me, I'm over it.
Amy
8:30 a.m. (the same day)
OPEN LETTER
As most of you know I am going through a difficult time with my health right now. And for some reason I'm having a hard time discussing it. But a few days ago I had a brilliant idea that I got from my friend Aimee. I've decided to write letters to my disease. And as strange as that sounds writing about it is really helping. Being able to direct my feelings toward someone (or something) is turning out to be just what I need.
I'm not sure if this is a great idea to post these. Makes me feel super vulnerable, but I'm hoping that in some strange way it will help. I've been holding on to these, and well, I just need to get rid of them. Post them, and then move on. So, I'm sorry if these make you feel uncomfortable. Please feel free to not read them. I know they are not typical Naptime style, but well, life isn't so typical anymore.
Dear MM,
I hate what you are doing to me. Stealing part of my life away.
Tonight, for the first time, you stepped in and affected my world. I've been dealing with you for some time now, your sneaky annoying way that you are always there, reminding me that life is no longer as it once was.
You've robbed me of my hearing. You've taken away the simple ability to focus and enjoy social situations as I once did. But by far the most annoying thing you have bestowed upon me is the incessant ringing. This fire alarm going off in my ear 24/7 is just plain cruel. No one should have to live this way. And often the thought of having to, makes me depressed and anxious. Sometimes the simple thought of not EVER being able to just hear silence scares me so much. But all this, annoying as it is, I know I can handle. Some days you are more fierce and belligerent than others, but I always know that I can get through it. I know that if I can just keep my head above water, keep putting one foot in front of the other that you can't steal my life away. You won't win. But tonight that all changed.
Tonight you stole something so precious to me. And I hate you for it. I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, but above all that I am a Mother. It is who I am at the core of my being and what I love to do. And tonight you took that away from me. And it is killing me. I awoke just a few moments ago by Hubs. I didn't hear a single thing. Just my fire alarm like always. I awoke because I felt him get out of bed. As he was quickly walking out of the room, I realized something was wrong. When he got back I asked him if everything was okay. He told me that one of the children had waken up and was crying. Nothing that a quick hug couldn't fix. He got back into bed, and promptly went back to sleep. I on the other hand did not. I was confused. A child was crying? And I didn't hear it? How could that be? Then I realized it was because of you. You had taken this from me. Being able to hear my child. Being able to help him. I feel robbed. Violated. And it makes me so sad. I'm crying so hard I can't sleep. For the first time you have robbed me of the opportunity to be a mother. I have NEVER slept through a child waking up in the middle of the night. EVER. But as you are well aware, the symptoms you give me are far worse by night than by day. I am saddened by the thought that I couldn't hear him. That I can't hear him. And you took that from me. Took the opportunity from me to mother. To console, and to love. And I hate you for that. I hate you so much.
Amy
12:38 a.m.
I'm not sure if this is a great idea to post these. Makes me feel super vulnerable, but I'm hoping that in some strange way it will help. I've been holding on to these, and well, I just need to get rid of them. Post them, and then move on. So, I'm sorry if these make you feel uncomfortable. Please feel free to not read them. I know they are not typical Naptime style, but well, life isn't so typical anymore.
Dear MM,
I hate what you are doing to me. Stealing part of my life away.
Tonight, for the first time, you stepped in and affected my world. I've been dealing with you for some time now, your sneaky annoying way that you are always there, reminding me that life is no longer as it once was.
You've robbed me of my hearing. You've taken away the simple ability to focus and enjoy social situations as I once did. But by far the most annoying thing you have bestowed upon me is the incessant ringing. This fire alarm going off in my ear 24/7 is just plain cruel. No one should have to live this way. And often the thought of having to, makes me depressed and anxious. Sometimes the simple thought of not EVER being able to just hear silence scares me so much. But all this, annoying as it is, I know I can handle. Some days you are more fierce and belligerent than others, but I always know that I can get through it. I know that if I can just keep my head above water, keep putting one foot in front of the other that you can't steal my life away. You won't win. But tonight that all changed.
Tonight you stole something so precious to me. And I hate you for it. I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, but above all that I am a Mother. It is who I am at the core of my being and what I love to do. And tonight you took that away from me. And it is killing me. I awoke just a few moments ago by Hubs. I didn't hear a single thing. Just my fire alarm like always. I awoke because I felt him get out of bed. As he was quickly walking out of the room, I realized something was wrong. When he got back I asked him if everything was okay. He told me that one of the children had waken up and was crying. Nothing that a quick hug couldn't fix. He got back into bed, and promptly went back to sleep. I on the other hand did not. I was confused. A child was crying? And I didn't hear it? How could that be? Then I realized it was because of you. You had taken this from me. Being able to hear my child. Being able to help him. I feel robbed. Violated. And it makes me so sad. I'm crying so hard I can't sleep. For the first time you have robbed me of the opportunity to be a mother. I have NEVER slept through a child waking up in the middle of the night. EVER. But as you are well aware, the symptoms you give me are far worse by night than by day. I am saddened by the thought that I couldn't hear him. That I can't hear him. And you took that from me. Took the opportunity from me to mother. To console, and to love. And I hate you for that. I hate you so much.
Amy
12:38 a.m.
Friday, March 27, 2009
TUESDAY'S TIP WATER BLUSH
Okay, so I realize that it's not Tuesday, but well, just go with it.
So, this one is for all you girls out there. Now, I've never been much of a makeup girl. In fact, I've probably only wore eyeshadow like 4 times in my life. One of them being my wedding. I hate putting it on and taking it off. And more than anything, I HATE to feel like I am wearing makeup.
But I have a confession. You know how most girls won't go out in public without mascara? Well, I am like that about blush. Seriously. I think I might be addicted to blush, and this one in particular. I probably wear too much because of it, but for some reason I just don't feel awake without blush. I know, I need help. But color is just good. Makes me feel healthy and alive. That's not a bad thing right?
Well, before two weeks ago I was a powder blush kinda girl. Only thing was, it would look great for a few hours, and then before too long I was looking dead. Blush would literally fall off. And well, sure I've tried cream blushes, and lets just say yes they stay on all day but it also feels like you have an oil spill on your chicks. All gooey and just no. Then one day I was browsing Tarjay and came across this little beauty.
It's called Water Blush by Pixi beauty. Pixi makeup is a company based out of London, but they sell their products at Target. Fab-u-lous. So, I see it in all it's liquid glory, and well, since I'm a sucker for blush I decide to give it a go despite it's $20 price tag. And well, I have to say, it's simply lovely. I put it on once in the a.m. and it stays put. Seriously. It looks EXACTLY the same when I head in to go to bed. No need to reapply when you go out for the evening. And no need for goo cheeks. But beware. This little tube of water is potent. It only takes like one or two drops per cheek. I rub it in with my finger and then go over it with a q-tip to take the top layer off. And I look sunkissed all day. It comes in two colors. One more pink and one more orange.
So, if you, like me, HATE reapplying blush, then next time you are at Tarjay give this little bottle a go. Sure it's $20 but I'm certain that it will last into the millennium.
Pixi Water Blush
Target
$20
So, this one is for all you girls out there. Now, I've never been much of a makeup girl. In fact, I've probably only wore eyeshadow like 4 times in my life. One of them being my wedding. I hate putting it on and taking it off. And more than anything, I HATE to feel like I am wearing makeup.
But I have a confession. You know how most girls won't go out in public without mascara? Well, I am like that about blush. Seriously. I think I might be addicted to blush, and this one in particular. I probably wear too much because of it, but for some reason I just don't feel awake without blush. I know, I need help. But color is just good. Makes me feel healthy and alive. That's not a bad thing right?
Well, before two weeks ago I was a powder blush kinda girl. Only thing was, it would look great for a few hours, and then before too long I was looking dead. Blush would literally fall off. And well, sure I've tried cream blushes, and lets just say yes they stay on all day but it also feels like you have an oil spill on your chicks. All gooey and just no. Then one day I was browsing Tarjay and came across this little beauty.
It's called Water Blush by Pixi beauty. Pixi makeup is a company based out of London, but they sell their products at Target. Fab-u-lous. So, I see it in all it's liquid glory, and well, since I'm a sucker for blush I decide to give it a go despite it's $20 price tag. And well, I have to say, it's simply lovely. I put it on once in the a.m. and it stays put. Seriously. It looks EXACTLY the same when I head in to go to bed. No need to reapply when you go out for the evening. And no need for goo cheeks. But beware. This little tube of water is potent. It only takes like one or two drops per cheek. I rub it in with my finger and then go over it with a q-tip to take the top layer off. And I look sunkissed all day. It comes in two colors. One more pink and one more orange.
So, if you, like me, HATE reapplying blush, then next time you are at Tarjay give this little bottle a go. Sure it's $20 but I'm certain that it will last into the millennium.
Pixi Water Blush
Target
$20
P.S. Thanks for all those of you who have called or e-mailed or talked to me in person. I didn't mean to scare any of you. Life certainly has been interesting lately. But I've decided that well, yes, blush is stupid. Really stupid. And blogging about it is even more so. But for some reason, I like too. I know it makes no sense. But for now, I'm going to try to keep plugging along. Keep doing the things that brought me joy before. Everyone is dealing with shit. That's life, right? My shit isn't any more worse than yours. I just seem to be really crappy at handling it. Come Wednesday, I'm hoping answers will help. And maybe one day I will get the cahotes to blog about it. Okay, this is getting cheezy. Thanks for reading, supporting, and just being there. The end.
YOUR DAILY GIGGLE
Okay, so I realize Naptime has been a little heavy on the videos lately. And British ones at that. Sorry about that. But, today I watched this not-so-little interview, and it made me laugh. Out loud. This is Zac Efron at the Graham Norton show over in London. I'm going to have to check and see if this is on BBC America because dang are these guys funny. And I'm always up for funny.
Check it out if you'd like!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
SOMETHING A LITTLE WILD TO LOOK FORWARD TOO. . .
Is anyone else as excited about this as I am?
Love this book. Love Max. Love his mother. Hope I love the movie too.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Au Naturale
So, my friend Jenny let me in on one of Salt Lake's little known gems. It's a healthy fast food joint here in Sugar house. It's called Au Naturale and from my visit today, I can tell you I will definitely be back.Here is a picture from the outside. It's located on 2100 S. and 800 E. They are open for breakfast 6:30-10:30 a.m. and open for lunch and dinner starting at 11 a.m.
Their food is healthy, tasty and completely natural. I love the drive thru option. Today my kiddos and I sampled the Vegetable and goat cheese wrap, sweet potato (baked) fries, and the acai berry frozen yogurt. And it was all absolutely fantastic. Sure it's a bit pricey, but I feel better putting this kinda food in my body (and my kids') than all that other crap out there. The sweet potato baked fries might just be a new addiction of mine. Yum-o! Some of their other eats include a Roasted yam & Black Bean burrito, grilled southwest chicken sandwich, house made chicken pot pie, house-smoked bbq pulled pork, soups, salads and some delicious healthy deserts. Plus, I love a company that will happily put their nutritional information on their website (hello Cafe Rio!!?) and they stand proudly behind it. I like to know what I'm eating. They have plenty of vegan, vegetarian, gluten -free and low-salt options. Thankyou Au Natural!
So, if you are in the market for some healthy eatin head on over to Au Natural. Trust me, for health food, you won't be disappointed.
Monday, March 9, 2009
--------------------------------------------------------------------->
So, in honor of my friend Aimee and her hubby Scott, and his fab new blog, I've decided to do a little vote of my own.
These little beauties are from this months FreePeople catalogue that came in the mail today. How do we feel about this bloggers? I mean, I pretty much love all things eighties, but really. Come on now. Isn't this just a bit ridiculous?
These little beauties are from this months FreePeople catalogue that came in the mail today. How do we feel about this bloggers? I mean, I pretty much love all things eighties, but really. Come on now. Isn't this just a bit ridiculous?
Either way, you must go visit www.voteordieblog.com. It's fun, free, and highlarryous! Add it to your googlereader and enjoy having your voice heard. And for the love of all that is holy, please vote on the right.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
OH. EM. GEE. I WAS RIGHT! WELL. . . .SORT OF.
Okay, now I realize everyone and their dog is blogging about this today, even those that normally don't, but I thought I'd go ahead and throw out my two cents anyhoo.
Okay, well, my first thought, honestly was, What a douchbag. I realize that's not a pretty word, but really, it is exactly what I was yelling at the tv.
I just don't get it. I mean, I get that you can really like two people at once, even date two people at once, but love? Now that's a strong word. And love enough that you want to propose to them? Uh, no. I mean, I realize the guy was confused, but I had to scream when he said he didn't know what he was going to do the day of the proposal. Gag me with a spoon Jason. Uggg.
So then, he picks Melissa and they all jump into the pool. Barf.
And then? Decides in six week,( SIX WEEKS people! ) of dating that he just isn't that into her. Oh, give me a break. They were never "in love". And everyone knows it. I wish they could just stop saying that already. They really really like each other. But love? Come. On.
Now, I can't decide if this is a production-pulled stunt or what. Cause I will be the first to admit that it made for fantastic TV. Just ask Hubs. I was laughing and yelling and booing. Crazy. I'm just glad I got to watch it after I got home from yoga. No commercials is the only way to watch the Bachelor. 3hours? Puh-leeze. Who has that type of time?
Okay, so I guess I just think Jason needs to be by himself for a while. Obviously he is very confused. I mean he went from being married, to on the bachelor, to proposing to DeAnna, to proposing to Melissa to dumping Melissa to wanting to be with Molly. Sheesh. I need a road map. And thinking back I think we have ONE person to blame in all this.
DE freaking Anna. If Jason had followed his gut and went with the "wild card" Molly like Deanna told him not to, he wouldn't even be in this mess. Don't get me wrong, I still think it's really all Jason's fault, but it's kinda fun to blame Deanna for a minute. What a loser.
Okay, but dumping Melissa on national TV? In the words of Stephanie Tanner, "How Rude!" I mean he could have dated her for a few more weeks, called it off in private, then called Molly. Did he really need to be such a @$$ about it? Geez.
And Molly. Where do I even begin? How about, why on God's green earth do you want to be with a loser like Jason? Obviously he has commitment issues. He's proposed to 4 women already! She should have done herself a favor and said hell to the no. But instead, she starts kissing him two seconds after he dumped Melissa. Jason must have an ego the size of Texas.
Well, sheesh. I'd like to now say that I will never watch the Bachelor again. But you know I just can't go that far. Sure it's ridiculous. Anyone who thinks you can meet a man and fall in love enough to be proposed to or propose to someone in six weeks, while living with the other people that person is dating is just plain cookoo crazy. But I love every single insane second. And you have to admit. . . That was some AWESOME tv. Sure it's messed up. And when you realize that those are real people with feelings it kinda makes you feel silly, but for entertainment value? BRILLIANT!
I can't believe I was right. Molly wins. Or loses. Depending on how you see it.
Monday, March 2, 2009
PICK A WINNER JASON
Okay, so here we are again. The season finale of the Bachelor. Wow. It's been a crazy ride. And honestly I went from really liking Jason to thinking he is crap sandwich face for letting Jillian go. What a loser.
But how fantastic was the Women Tell All ep? Oh man, that Natalie is so la-hame. Seriously. The comment about her not being able to live without her blackberry? Hilarious. Those producers really know how to pick em.
But by far and away the best moment of the night was when Jillian put Jason right on the spot about him saying he hadn't kissed anyone like that in a long time. Classic. Just trying to make him squirm a bit and I loved it. But can we, just for a moment discuss this business:
Now, I'm not sure how I feel about this. Yes, I absolutely was and am a fan of Jillian. If she had made it to the finale I would totally be posting a picture of me in my team Jillian shirt. But Jill as the next bachelorette? I'm not sure I like this idea. Jill should know better. I want her to realize what a crock this whole Bachelor business is. 1 couple out of 13 are actually married. Those aren't such great odds really considering every episdode pretty much someone proposes. Unless of course you are that lame-0 dude three seasons ago who didn't propose to either. Ha. That was awesome. I just want Jillian to meet someone really fabulous. Not some bachelor reject. Is that too harsh? But, I guess if she does become the next bachelorette I will have to watch. Cause you know how those producers are. They will reel you in, show you a few steamy hot tub scenes and completely fool you. How do you all feel about this bachelorette proposition? Yay. Nay?
Now, on to today's loveliness. Melissa or Molly? To me, either way he's getting 2nd best. Melissa seems sooooo young. And really. Did you see the dress she wore to the last rose ceremony? Did she forget she would be on national TV? She needs to hire Jillian to be her stylist stat. There is some serious valley mall rat creeping out if you ask me. Girlfriend needs help. And that stupid bump already. Uggg.
I guess, in all honesty I'm not really looking forward to this finale as I have in past seasons. I mean, sure I want to know which one he picks, I just can't say I really care anymore. Still too sad about Jill. Took me two whole weeks until I was emotionally ready to discuss the Bachelor via the blog again.
But let me tell you one thing. So help me if Jason tells Chris Harrison that he doesn't know who he's going to pick the same day he's due to propose or even the night before I will just scream. And loud. How do you not know? How can you be in love with two people? And how, for the love of all that is holy,how can you not know before a few hours before who you are going to ask to spend the rest of your life with?! Puh-leeze.
And just for a moment I'd like to vent about the Deanna lame-ness. They make us wait until the last episode? And then make it seem like he is crying about her? We all know he cries after he dumps Melissa. I mean, um.
That's right, I'm calling out that he will pick Molly. Why on earth would I make such a silly assumption? Because every time I pick the shoo-in, the choice that is so obvious (due to editing) I NEVER get it right. So even though the producers want me to think Mel and Jason have this fantastic connection, I'm not buying it. I'm all in for Molly.
One thing is for certain though. Monday nights just won't be the same without the bachelor. It's provided some good blog fodder fur-shizee. Who is your pick? Melissa or Molly?
But how fantastic was the Women Tell All ep? Oh man, that Natalie is so la-hame. Seriously. The comment about her not being able to live without her blackberry? Hilarious. Those producers really know how to pick em.
But by far and away the best moment of the night was when Jillian put Jason right on the spot about him saying he hadn't kissed anyone like that in a long time. Classic. Just trying to make him squirm a bit and I loved it. But can we, just for a moment discuss this business:
Now, I'm not sure how I feel about this. Yes, I absolutely was and am a fan of Jillian. If she had made it to the finale I would totally be posting a picture of me in my team Jillian shirt. But Jill as the next bachelorette? I'm not sure I like this idea. Jill should know better. I want her to realize what a crock this whole Bachelor business is. 1 couple out of 13 are actually married. Those aren't such great odds really considering every episdode pretty much someone proposes. Unless of course you are that lame-0 dude three seasons ago who didn't propose to either. Ha. That was awesome. I just want Jillian to meet someone really fabulous. Not some bachelor reject. Is that too harsh? But, I guess if she does become the next bachelorette I will have to watch. Cause you know how those producers are. They will reel you in, show you a few steamy hot tub scenes and completely fool you. How do you all feel about this bachelorette proposition? Yay. Nay?
Now, on to today's loveliness. Melissa or Molly? To me, either way he's getting 2nd best. Melissa seems sooooo young. And really. Did you see the dress she wore to the last rose ceremony? Did she forget she would be on national TV? She needs to hire Jillian to be her stylist stat. There is some serious valley mall rat creeping out if you ask me. Girlfriend needs help. And that stupid bump already. Uggg.
And then there is Molly, and her hypnotizing eyes (or so Jason says). I have to admit, she is absolutely gorgeous, but I just kinda think her personality is a little lame. Seriously, golf. Really? Have you played? Stupidest game ever. Hit a ball as far as you can. Take 10-15 minutes walking to find it. Find it. Then hit it as far away as possible, and go get it again. Um, no thanks.
However Molly does get a few points for having better style and mostly steers clear of the bumpit hair. Also, that bubble bath farting scene had me laughing. So that is something. This whole time I've thought Melissa was younger, but really Molly is only 24. And that my good friends is young.
I guess, in all honesty I'm not really looking forward to this finale as I have in past seasons. I mean, sure I want to know which one he picks, I just can't say I really care anymore. Still too sad about Jill. Took me two whole weeks until I was emotionally ready to discuss the Bachelor via the blog again.
But let me tell you one thing. So help me if Jason tells Chris Harrison that he doesn't know who he's going to pick the same day he's due to propose or even the night before I will just scream. And loud. How do you not know? How can you be in love with two people? And how, for the love of all that is holy,how can you not know before a few hours before who you are going to ask to spend the rest of your life with?! Puh-leeze.
And just for a moment I'd like to vent about the Deanna lame-ness. They make us wait until the last episode? And then make it seem like he is crying about her? We all know he cries after he dumps Melissa. I mean, um.
That's right, I'm calling out that he will pick Molly. Why on earth would I make such a silly assumption? Because every time I pick the shoo-in, the choice that is so obvious (due to editing) I NEVER get it right. So even though the producers want me to think Mel and Jason have this fantastic connection, I'm not buying it. I'm all in for Molly.
One thing is for certain though. Monday nights just won't be the same without the bachelor. It's provided some good blog fodder fur-shizee. Who is your pick? Melissa or Molly?
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