PRODUCT JUNKIE Daily Bread

So, if you are anything like me, whenever you hear the words food storage you just mostly just pretend you didn't. That's right. I used to be one of those non-practicing food storage Latter-Day-Saints. Gasp! The shock. Sinead O' Rebellion. That's right. I admit it.

Even though many, many righteous men & women have told me "Be Prepared", I just couldn't. Or didn't. Or didn't want too. Honestly, even the thought or idea, or (even worse) a lesson, on food storage was enough to have me run into the cultural hall and slam my head against the brick walls over and over again.

In the past this concept has been just too difficult to wrap my little catastrophe-avoiding mind around. I mean, yes, I am aware that I'm supposed to have a food storage. And yes, I'm aware that I live VERY CLOSE to a fault line. And yes, I see the wisdom. But no, I don't want to discuss it.

I guess I just figured if there ever was a real need, or calamity or something, I'd just walk the mile and a half to my parents house and eat theirs. Except well, now it's not quite that easy. You see, I'd have to drag my three year old and two year old all the way there too, and share it with them and all (I hope you can hear the sarcasm in my voice people). Plus, my parents have had theirs since I was a kid, so really I would be petty scared to open up those boxes. I think I'd rather starve.

There are just so many good reasons for me NOT to have it. Well, firstly, to be quite honest I don't cook. Seriously. Some people say that to sound cool or something, but no really, I can't cook. At all. Ever. And when I do, it's bad. So I've just decided to stay away from it altogether. (No, we don't eat out every meal. Lucky for me Hubs is a fantastic cook.) So usually in the past when I've thought of food storage I've thought of those 500 pound barrels of wheat sitting in some one's basement. Oh great. What on earth am I going to do with 5oo pounds of wheat? Grind it? Yeah right. Bake it? In what? In my opinion if things are so bad, that I am desperate enough to resort to my barrel of wheat, then I doubt I'm gonna have an electric grinder, or an oven to bake that darn wheat in. So then, I guess I could just have to eat the wheat kernels raw. Nah, I think I'd rather die. So that whole idea, was out.

And Hubs idea of food storage was alot easier. So easy in fact, its almost non-existent. And it's super cheap, well, free really. You don't have to store anything, or bake. Yes, his idea of food storage was keeping all the past episodes of Survivorman and Man Vs. Wild on our DVR. Hmmm. Yeah.

Yes, there are other ways to go about food storage. Like my previous method. 700 cans of Spagettios in my pantry. Yum. But then I realized that 3 months on Spagettios was going to be about as much fun as eating the raw wheat. Plus, I guess I hear that Spagettios don't last forever (shock!) so eventually you have to replace them, and yadda yadda. You can see why all my previous attempts at gaining a food storage haven't been so successful.

Until . . . .

I heard about Daily Bread. They are a little company that started after the recent Asia tsunami tragedy. A few guys who were friends realized that their families were really unprepared in the case of an emergency and so they sought out a way to obtain a food storage. (Been there done that.) But they quickly ran into some of the problems I had. The expense, obstacles of storing it (not enough space, rotation, etc.), how long it would last, and how to use it. So they started looking into freeze dried foods. Okay, so I know what you are thinking. But stay with me. Are you having bad flashbacks to your scouting days when you had to try an MRE? Well, these are much the same, except they taste really, really good. I promise.

Basically what they are is freeze dried food. And all you have to do is add water. Seriously. If it's hot water, they taste better, but really, hot water, and let it sit for about 10 minutes and then, walla, you have a meal. This is my kind of cooking. No measuring, grinding, kneading, or baking. Just open, pour, stir, open, eat. Simple right? But the best thing about all of it, in my humble opinion, is the fact that it lasts TWENTY FIVE YEARS!!! Did you get that? 25 Years!

That's right. No rotating the food. No worrying about the food being bad, or opening it up to only find weavels or something gross. Nope, it's completely good for twenty five years, and in most cases, even longer. And if you even think for a minute in 25 years it won't taste that great, guess what? You are wrong. It tastes the same today as it will then. And speaking of taste. . .

It really is good. Vegetables, meat, potatoes. The good stuff. And are you worried about the price? Well, you shouldn't be. It's only about $2.30 a serving. That's pretty darn good. We got our family set up for an entire years worth of food. And the best part? We didn't have to pay it all out in one lump sum, which has been another factor adding to our reasons we've been putting this off. Daily Bread is allowing us to pay it in a few monthly installments. Yay. In just a few short months, I'll be free from ever worrying about food storage again. At least, for 25 years. And storing it? It's all so small, that it fits under a bed, or in a closet even. No needing an entire storage or pantry for this stuff.

And the best part? No more nightmares of raw wheat or Spagettios for this girl. Nope. My family is covered. And ya know what? It feels great. It's nice to finally have that annoying "food storage monkey" off my back. And now, I won't be going to hell. Well, at least not for not having food storage for my family. Now I can say "Yes !"with pride in my temple recommend interview when asked about food storage.

Okay, so if you are at all interested in getting more information, you can head on over to their website, or if you live in the Land of Zion you can just give this super friendly guy that sold us ours a call. His name is Zach Brown. His phone number is 669-6094. Or you can e-mail him at bwrestler13o@gmail.com. I swear I do not get a single dime if you call him. But you still should. Just to taste the stuff. Cause really, I now know your families food storage plan is to come over to my house in the case of an emergency, but you know we won't be just letting that stuff go for free. Hey we are Christians, so we'll barter. And just so you know we really like the white and pink frosted circus animal cookies with the sprinkles.

You are welcome.

I'd say nap time today was a success. You?

PRODUCT JUNKIE rei sale baby!

Well, hello everyone. I hope you are all having a fan-double-tastic Thursday. I just wanted to make sure you all knew about one of my favorite sales of the year. The REI anniversary sale. It's always a good one. And REI is within spitting distance so, we like it. Plus, if you are a member you can save an extra 20% off one item. And that is just fantastic if you ask me. We hit this sale every year without fail, and here are some of REI 08 anniversary sale purchases.

1st item:
So, do you see this beauty? All I can say is, Happy Mothers Day to me. Remember a ways back when I told you Hubs had so lovingly and graciously signed me up for the Ragnar Relay without my approval? Well, by darn it, it's turning out to be a great thing. (But don't tell him that, or he'll start signing me up for all sorts of other crap left and right without my approval.) So, anyways this little gadget is the Garmin 205. And isn't it beautiful? Hubs received one for Christmas from my parents last year, and I have been borrowing (and coveting) his everyday since. But I really wanted to get my own so I could track my own runs, and tally calories burned (so I knew how many Creamy's from the day before I'd burned off) and all that. Plus, sharing items you sweat on is not something I recommend. And then, like a sign from God, my REI anniversary magazine comes in the mail. And there it is. My future Garmin 205 staring up at me from the page. And on sale! And practically yelling at me. "Buy me! I'm on sale! I will make you happy! And thin! And buy me!" So, what's a girl to do? Well, I went up and bought it of course. And I've been happily enjoying it ever since. And now that I even have a running group (yay! Holla Christine, Kelly, Jenny, Suzanne & Marinanne) it's been awesome to see exactly how far we are running and just how slow or fast we are going. Yep, we are up to 4.5 miles a few times a week. And it feels great. I mean, it feels nice to be getting in shape, but the early-morning start (6am), although I thought at first it might kill me, is turning out to be something I (gasp!) almost look forward too. It's nice to get out, start my day off with a little workout and get to chat with the girls the whole way. There is something priceless about being about to discuss your dismay at Lauren & Brody not ever actually making it to "couple-hood" and swooning for a few minutes about Steven making an appearance, and dogging Heidi & Spencer for a few blocks that just sets my day off on the right foot.** Maybe Hubs knew that deep down somewhere in some small hollow spot in my heart there is a place that LOVES early morning runs with good girlfriends. Maybe that's why he signed me up. Then again, maybe he just needed another runner.


Okay, next item purchased:

How cute are these Keens? Got Thing 2 and me matching pairs! (Are you rolling your eyes? That's okay so did Hubs.) Did you know that if you wear a 7 1/2 or smaller in women's shoes then you can fit into kids shoes? Well, I have been sporting kids shoes since back in the day when Doc Martens were all the rage. Wow, that dates me a bit. Doc Martin's and Girbauds. The nineties rocked! Hey, don't laugh. Kids shoes, especially brand name ones, are made just as well as their adult counterparts for like 1/4-1/2 the price. $30 versus $100. No question. And if you've never worn Keens, really I don't know what to say to you other than, "You are missing out on a little slice of heaven right here on earth." That's right. It's like walking in mashed potatoes. Except without the lumps, and goo and mess. Okay, bad analogy. Just try some on already. Your feet can thank me later.

Third item purchased:

Each year we hit this sale to get the kids their sandals for the summer. Thing 1 did not want to match is sister and mother. And he politely told me so, by yelling at the top of his lungs in front of everyone that he did "not want to wear girl shoes"And I can't really blame him. Except for the yelling. Dang, for having a hearing loss, that kid sure can make some noise. So, he picked this lovely shade of green instead.

Okay, so if your interested in channeling your inner granola, head on over HERE and check out the sweet sale.

** Yes, I know it's fake. But so is Diet Dr. Pepper. And even though we all know it will probably kill us one day (aspartame), we still love it, covet it, and drink it. Because of it's fake syrupy goodness. Just sing along with U2 and me, "Even better than the real thing."

TUESDAY'S TIP gas prices

Okay, well today's tip comes again from good old Mary Jo. She never disappoints. Today she sent me a little link that I think just maybe, might need to be added to my favorites list. And it came just in the nick of time. Saturday Hubs thought he would do me a favor and stop off and fill up my car for me. This was very sweet. But I think he almost had a heart attack when he found out it was $75 bucks to fill er up. Maybe next time he will head on ova here first, pop in our zip code, see where he can save, and fill er up there.


I wish I had one of those cool electric cars. That look like they have no doors or windows or roofs. Maybe this wouldn't be fantastic with kids, but it would be fun.


And a lot cheaper.

A LITTLE BIRTHDAY FIB

Yesterday, after primary, but before Sacrament meeting, the primary president comes running toward me with a worried look on her face and says, "Oh my goodness. I feel horrible. Did we forget Thing 1's birthday this month?"


I kind of look at her strangly, and say, "Um, No. Thing 1's birthday isn't until August."


She looks back at me, and we both begin smiling, because the reality of the situation and basically knowing Thing 1, starts to come together for both of us and she says, "Well, he must like suckers."







Yep. My three-year-old lies at church. I mean, come on. At least if your gonna lie, don't do it at church. Come on kid. Where's your morals? Lying in church about your birthday for a sucker? Classic.

JUST ANOTHER MANIC MONDAY

Okay, if I may, I'd like to discuss something that's been ruffling my feathers ever since March 18th, and frankly, I just can't seem to let it go.


What is it you ask? Well, let me tell you.


March 18th just so happened to be Hub's birthday, and being the fantastic wife that I am, I threw my two kids into the bath, made them look presentable, swung by Costco, picked up some cupcakes, and balloons and headed over to Hub's office to surprise him.


And that is when it happened. The little occurrence that will forever be known as "the incidence of ot-eight". . Seriously, so furious.


Okay, so some quick background. Hubs is a fantastic commercial real-estate agent. (Really. If you need some commercial space, just ask him.) When you are in this business you work for a broker. Well, sort of. Well, better said, is you work under a brokerage. All the agents, including Hubs are really independent contractors. Which is just a fancy way of saying they work for themselves, and have to pay all their taxes. Glamorous right?


Okay, so back to the office. There I am with two kids in tow, mind you, and Hubs is no where to be seen. Apparently he went out for a little birthday lunch with his partners. Which is totally fine. I should have called, but really, that would have ruined the surprise. So, I turn around, and one of Hub's co-workers who sits a cube over stands up, walks over to say hi.


And normally this would have been fine. BUT IT WASN'T. Why, you ask?


Because, he had a huge mouthful of barfalicious, disgusting, nasty chew. Yes, as in Tobacco chew. And a spit cup. And I was so mortified, and completely grossed out, that I didn't even say Hi back. He probably thinks I'm a bitch now. Which is partly true. But really, chew in the office?!?!?!?!?!?!


It's just disgusting. EwWWWWW! Not to mention, then Thing 1 asks me what he had in his mouth. I am thinking to myself, Really, I'm going to have this conversation, no, not at a ballpark, but at the OFFICE?


Uggg. Now, am I not conveying my complete and total distaste, and disgust at this whole thing? Well then, LET ME BE CLEAR. I was totally disgusted, and irate, and grossed out. So, I grab my kids and leave.


So, of course the first thing I practically shout at Hubs on his birthday no less, "They let you chew tobacco at work?!?!?!!?" His response?


"Well, not me, but technically? Yes, I guess. We are independent contractors, so we really aren't employees." Then he goes on. . . "Allot of guys at the office do it. It's not just (barf-head who sits next to me)."


"What? That is insane! Not to mention, gross, disgusting, and unsanitary!!!!!"


Hubs just laughs. I want to ring his neck, his gross co-workers neck, and the owner of his brokerage's neck.





Okay, now seriously, how is this okay? I mean I get that they are not employees, but really, do they have some sort of office policy? Dress codes? Well, no. And I mean I guess I sort of get the logic behind it, because I realize if you take tobacco away, then you have to take coffee away, and then god-forbid short skirts and midriffs, and then what do you have? A normal office maybe? Strange concept.


But the thing is, coffee can make your co-workers breath reek, but really that doesn't affect you. Short skirts, can make you cringe when you see a bit too-much but it's not going to kill you, but tobacco? It affects everyone. Everyone who has to see you with that ridiculously big fat yucky lip sticking out and your nasty chew cup. Everyone has to hear and see them spit. This has to make for a lovely work environment.


Seriously. Iamthisclose to writing an anonymous letter to the owner of his brokerage, only now I guess it won't be quite so anonymous. But really, am I the only one who finds this ridiculous?


I mean, I think it's disgusting. Spit cups at work? You have got to be kidding me. I think it is stupid enough on the ballfield, but at the office? EWWWWWWW!!!!




So, my question is, what is a girl to do? Just turn my head, ignore the stupidity of others, or take some sort of action? And if it's action, then what? A letter, a bad look, a conversation? And with who? Mind you, Hubs job is kinda important to our family. So, I don't know. If this was my gross neighbor at his house, then fine. Do what you may in your own free time on your own personal property. But at a place of business?!?!?!?!




And I apologize in advance to Hubs for having to listen to this rant one last time, and to my family who has heard me bitch and moan about this since March. Sorry, but chew at work? INSANE!

THE LACE PLACE

Oh the wonderful thing about girls,

Is you can put their hair into curls,

or a pony, or pigtail, braids or fishtail,

But with a ribbon you won't ever fail.

Gotta love the ribbon selection at the Lace Place. Now that Thing 2 has enough hair for piggies, and ponies, we decided to pick up some ribbon for fun. And let me tell you, it was.

PRODUCT JUNKIE Livestrong

Just wanted to share my latest love. At least when it comes to running clothes that is. Ordered these a few weeks back and have been enjoying them ever since. Now, don't get me wrong, it doesn't make it any easier to run. No, I still hate, wait--loathe, every step, but at least now, I know I look good. And come on, that's what really matters right?

And just because I love you all so very much, I thought I'd pass on a little discount to you my good friends. Now through May 8th take 15% off your order. They have running gear, cycling gear, golfing gear, and the good old yellow wrist bands. Plus lots of other stuff. Maybe it might be a good gift for that mother in your life? Wink, wink. Plus, it all goes towards a good cause. What could be better really? So, for all you athletic types, or couch potatoes with athletic mamas, ya might want to head on ova here to pick up some good stuff. You can thank me later.

MAY DAY, MAY DAY!

I really can't think of a better way to ring in may than with a few inches of snow. I kid, I kid.

Happy May Day Everyone!

TUESDAY'S TIP 31 cent scoop & boosterseats

Okay, so because I was late posting Tuesday's Tip, I am gonna do double duty just to show y'all how much I love ya!


So as many of you probably already know, TODAY-TONIGHT April 30th is 31 cent scoop night at Baskin Robins. From 5 to 11pm tonight you can join in on the all the fun. This delicious promotion helps the American Fire Fighters Assoc. so head on in for a good cause and some good ice cream at a great price.

See you there!

My next tip, is a little more on the safe side. Not nearly as fun, but twice as important. Next Monday the new Booster Seat Law goes into effect.

The new law states that any child under age eight MUST be in a booster seat or pay! Booster seats save lives people! There is one exception, children under 8 who are taller than 57 inches may sit in a regular seat with seat belt. To read up on the new law click here!

Please, please, if you have a child under 8, do the smart thing. Boost and Buckle!

FANCY NANCY

So, are any of you familiar with this book? If not, you must check it out. I simply love it. For many reasons. Nancy reminds me a bit of Olivia. They both understand the importance of accessorizng.


Yesterday at Thing 1's tee ball game, there was a little girl on his team who reminded me of Nancy. She had on red sparkly shoes (think Dorothy from Oz), a crown, a touch of blue eyeshadow, and a pink glove.


And I loved it. A girl who can play ball, and accessorize. Now, that's my kinda girl.

FOR TODAY:

Just for today I am loving that I have these adorable fingernails attached to these cute, squishy, baby hands so that I can paint them this lovely shade of fuschia.


This is Thing 2's first time ever letting her mama paint her nails. She sqealed with delight, I ate my cereal through watery eyes, because of the pure joy it brings me to know I have a girl to share these priceless moments with.


A little breakfast mani. Life is grand.

HAPPY EARTH DAY FRIENDS!

In honor of Earth Day 2008, I am going to recycle like a banshie, reduce my usual toilet paper quota by 2 sheets (whoa!), imagine myself planting a tree, and then walk outside, smell the semi-clean air and sing kumbaya with my children.

Happy Earth Day!

TUESDAY'S TIP petunia pickle bottom

Today's tip comes curtesy of Petunia Pickle Bottom themselves. I'm sure you've heard of and seen their lovely diaper bags, clothing and crib bedding. And normally I would put a cute picture of one of their adorable bags up, but PPB has disabled the lovely right click on their site, so you will just have to click here, to view their darling products.


Anyways, Petunia is having their semi-annual online sample sale. This is where you can get secconds, and discontinued items at more than half off. To check out the inventory go here.


Don't have a baby yourself? Trust me when I say, any new mother would be thrilled to get a PPB diaperbag, set of onesies, blankie, or crib bedding set for their new baby. And you'd better hurry cause the sale starts today, and ends on the 28th. So it won't last long. So go ahead already, shop your little heart out.








Oh, and one more tip. I just got an e-mail from Hugs & Bugs Children's Botique (2261 E. 3300 S.). They are having a last-chance opportunity to shop the last of their inventory (plus a few boxes of new things) before they close their doors for good. Everything will be 75% off! But hurry in today because this is a one-day only sale. Tuesday April 22 from 5-9 p.m. See you there!

MICHAEL ENDORSES OBAMA

I realize this might be a little much for some of you right-wingers out there, but I found this letter insightful, thought-provoking, and of course humorous (it's michael moore after all). Enjoy!

Monday, April 21st, 2008My Vote's for Obama (if I could vote) ...by Michael Moore

Friends,

I don't get to vote for President this primary season. I live in Michigan. The party leaders (both here and in D.C.) couldn't get their act together, and thus our votes will not be counted.
So, if you live in Pennsylvania, can you do me a favor? Will you please cast my vote -- and yours -- on Tuesday for Senator Barack Obama?

I haven't spoken publicly 'til now as to who I would vote for, primarily for two reasons: 1) Who cares?; and 2) I (and most people I know) don't give a rat's ass whose name is on the ballot in November, as long as there's a picture of JFK and FDR riding a donkey at the top of the ballot, and the word "Democratic" next to the candidate's name.

Seriously, I know so many people who don't care if the name under the Big "D" is Dancer, Prancer, Clinton or Blitzen. It can be Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Barry Obama or the Dalai Lama.

Well, that sounded good last year, but over the past two months, the actions and words of Hillary Clinton have gone from being merely disappointing to downright disgusting. I guess the debate last week was the final straw. I've watched Senator Clinton and her husband play this game of appealing to the worst side of white people, but last Wednesday, when she hurled the name "Farrakhan" out of nowhere, well that's when the silly season came to an early end for me. She said the "F" word to scare white people, pure and simple. Of course, Obama has no connection to Farrakhan. But, according to Senator Clinton, Obama's pastor does -- AND the "church bulletin" once included a Los Angeles Times op-ed from some guy with Hamas! No, not the church bulletin!

This sleazy attempt to smear Obama was brilliantly explained the following night by Stephen Colbert. He pointed out that if Obama is supported by Ted Kennedy, who is Catholic, and the Catholic Church is led by a Pope who was in the Hitler Youth, that can mean only one thing: OBAMA LOVES HITLER!

Yes, Senator Clinton, that's how you sounded. Like you were nuts. Like you were a bigot stoking the fires of stupidity. How sad that I would ever have to write those words about you. You have devoted your life to good causes and good deeds. And now to throw it all away for an office you can't win unless you smear the black man so much that the superdelegates cry "Uncle (Tom)" and give it all to you.

But that can't happen. You cast your die when you voted to start this bloody war. When you did that you were like Moses who lost it for a moment and, because of that, was prohibited from entering the Promised Land.

How sad for a country that wanted to see the first woman elected to the White House. That day will come -- but it won't be you. We'll have to wait for the current Democratic governor of Kansas to run in 2016 (you read it here first!).

There are those who say Obama isn't ready, or he's voted wrong on this or that. But that's looking at the trees and not the forest. What we are witnessing is not just a candidate but a profound, massive public movement for change. My endorsement is more for Obama The Movement than it is for Obama the candidate.

That is not to take anything away from this exceptional man. But what's going on is bigger than him at this point, and that's a good thing for the country. Because, when he wins in November, that Obama Movement is going to have to stay alert and active. Corporate America is not going to give up their hold on our government just because we say so. President Obama is going to need a nation of millions to stand behind him.

I know some of you will say, 'Mike, what have the Democrats done to deserve our vote?' That's a damn good question. In November of '06, the country loudly sent a message that we wanted the war to end. Yet the Democrats have done nothing. So why should we be so eager to line up happily behind them?

I'll tell you why. Because I can't stand one more friggin' minute of this administration and the permanent, irreversible damage it has done to our people and to this world. I'm almost at the point where I don't care if the Democrats don't have a backbone or a kneebone or a thought in their dizzy little heads. Just as long as their name ain't "Bush" and the word "Republican" is not beside theirs on the ballot, then that's good enough for me.

I, like the majority of Americans, have been pummeled senseless for 8 long years. That's why I will join millions of citizens and stagger into the voting booth come November, like a boxer in the 12th round, all bloodied and bruised with one eye swollen shut, looking for the only thing that matters -- that big "D" on the ballot.

Don't get me wrong. I lost my rose-colored glasses a long time ago.

It's foolish to see the Democrats as anything but a nicer version of a party that exists to do the bidding of the corporate elite in this country. Any endorsement of a Democrat must be done with this acknowledgement and a hope that one day we will have a party that'll represent the people first, and laws that allow that party an equal voice.

Finally, I want to say a word about the basic decency I have seen in Mr. Obama. Mrs. Clinton continues to throw the Rev. Wright up in his face as part of her mission to keep stoking the fears of White America. Every time she does this I shout at the TV, "Say it, Obama! Say that when she and her husband were having marital difficulties regarding Monica Lewinsky, who did she and Bill bring to the White House for 'spiritual counseling?' THE REVEREND JEREMIAH WRIGHT!"

But no, Obama won't throw that at her. It wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be decent. She's been through enough hurt. And so he remains silent and takes the mud she throws in his face.
That's why the crowds who come to see him are so large. That's why he'll take us down a more decent path. That's why I would vote for him if Michigan were allowed to have an election.
But the question I keep hearing is... 'can he win? Can he win in November?' In the distance we hear the siren of the death train called the Straight Talk Express. We know it's possible to hear the words "President McCain" on January 20th. We know there are still many Americans who will never vote for a black man. Hillary knows it, too. She's counting on it.

Pennsylvania, the state that gave birth to this great country, has a chance to set things right. It has not had a moment to shine like this since 1787 when our Constitution was written there. In that Constitution, they wrote that a black man or woman was only "three fifths" human. On Tuesday, the good people of Pennsylvania have a chance for redemption.

Yours,

Michael Moore

MichaelMoore.com

MMFlint@aol.com

Thoughts?

DORA THE EXPLORER

As Thing 2 was waking up from her nap today, this is what I heard coming from her room:

"Mommy, abre the door! Gracias amigos!"



Most parents would be bursting with pride. I however, decided it was time to cut back on the Nickelodeon.

Adios!

RIP OUTLET SHOPPING

Okay, so beware, I am about to let my pessimistic side run wild, so if you are an overly optimistic person, or a new reader, or prefer happy people, just know that I can't help it.

So, last Friday I thought it might be fun to round up the troops and head up to the Tanger Outlets in Park City. I usually love to go up to the outlets to do a little shopping now and again. Who can resist a new running shoe or pair of cheap shorts? I love to get out of the city, and head up the canyon, where the air seems just a bit clearer, and the prices a bit lower. And really, who doesn't love a bargain?

Well, prepare yourself friends, because now is where my lament will begin. As we were perusing the outlets, if I can even call them that anymore, I took one look around and announced: "These Aren't Outlets!" (By the way, no one cared. Not even hubs. He kept right on shopping. ) For Real. Where did all the outlets go?

And then I found myself in a quandary. Remember back in the day when you could head up to Park City and go in a store, and find last season's digg's for half the price? Well, my friends, that just doesn't happen anymore. Most of the stores up there, are just that. Stores. No outlet. No discount. It's like a big strip mall. Yuck! Seriously. There isn't one single store up there that even qualifies as an outlet. And in my book that means clothing from it's mother-store, but deeply discounted. But now, you just have stores that must have their own designers and their own lines. Because it just seems the clothes up there are now either a) not discounted, or b) they are crappy quality. I mean really, an Old Navy outlet? Does it get any more ridiculous?

I mean, I'm not sure really why this bugs me so much. It must be my vain, simple mind. Or maybe it's because I used to LOVE outlet shopping. But whatever the case, now, it's like just another mall. American Eagle, Children's Place, and Gymboree. Ugg. I can get that anywhere. And really, it would be fine, if the stuff was actually deeply discounted. But it's just not. And I can't stand it!

Now, I realize there are much more important things I could be brooding about. Things like global warming, abortion, and for darn sakes this RIDICULOUS war, but I just can't seem to understand where all the outlets have gone. And this upsets me. And no, people aren't dying because of it, but I just can't sleep well anymore knowing that outlets are becoming extinct.

What will I do? Where will I go to find the joy of bargain hunting? Online? Sure, Zappos, overstock, and Ebay have great deals, but there's not the twenty minute getaway, and the air? Not nearly as clear.

So, I guess my only option is to mourn the "outlet". Say good-bye and move on. May the joy of "outlet" shopping forever rest in peace.

MICHELLE TANNER, IS THAT YOU?

Seriously choked on my Corn Chex this morning when I saw this.


Is that a sweat band? Like that people wear at the gym? Well, actually old men with tube socks wear at the gym? Except, wait, is it velvet? A velvet sweat band?

Fancy.


P.S. On a totally serious note . . . is she wearing one shoulder pad? Cause I mean that's bad. Not that she's wearing just one, but no, the fact that shoulderpads could be on their way back in. This scares me. Or wait, what if she isn't wearing a shoulder pad and actually just has one super-tall shoulder? Eww, that's wierd. And even worse than wearing one shoulder pad.

Or that sweatband.


Looking at this picture makes me feel like I need to gas up the delorian and head back to 2008.

GETTING REAL, THE THIRD SHIFT, AND TOXIC SHAME

"Everyone needs a sense of shame, but no one needs to feel ashamed." --Frederick Nietzche

Okay, so a few of my good blogging friends have been posting fantastic fodder lately. And I love it.


My friend Aimee, who is a grad student in marriage and family therapy, just recently did a very poignant, raw, and I think rather gutsy post all about her thoughts on gender equality, socialization of women, and the third shift. You can read her amazing post here.

Then there is my other friend Kristin who just did a little post all about getting real. She discusses the constant pressure people in the blogging world feel to "measure up." And how some bloggers constantly compare themselves to others. But in reality they are just seeing the edited version of others.


I enjoyed both of these posts and commented on them both briefly. But the more I read the comments of others and reflect, I realize that I have many more thoughts on both of these subjects and how they are related and thought it might be nice to do my own little (or not-so-little) post myself.


Okay, first off, Kristin's post immediately caught my attention, because I too, have heard this same thing from some of my own bloggging buddies. The whole attitude that they just hate the comparison and don't feel they can handle the pressure of writing about their lives and how they portray themselves.

And my comment to this is simple. People who blog, rather, people who blog well (and there is a difference) do so because they enjoy it. Put simply folks, you won't see me in any scrapbooking clubs or quilting bees. Why? Because I hate that stuff. And I wouldn't in a million years try to do something that I suck at, then complain that others are better than me. Is that too harsh? Well, it's not that I think I'm fantastic at blogging or anything (cause let's face it, I'm not), but I guess I just really enjoy it. And if I suck, well, too bad. Don't read it. I don't care how many people read my blog, and even though I do have a site meter, I don't measure my worth by it. For darn sakes people, if you find joy in blogging then blog. If not, well, stop. It's not worth the anxiety is it?

The reason I do this, is well, I honestly can't scrapbook. In fact I don't think God gave me a single crafty gene. And as much as my children frustrate me, I really do want to remember these years. In essence it is a way for me to be a virtual scrapbooker. Remember all the fun times with way-too-long descriptions.

And it's funny because with my pessimistic attitude I find that I don't really edit my life all that well. Sure, there are areas of my life I'm not really willing to share, but for the most part, I find that I get the most joy out of this strange sport when I share the good, the bad and the ugly. And although it's not a 100% accurate portrayal of my life, I do find, the more honest I am, the more fun I have. Maybe it's because we (society) like to see how other people live their lives. Hence the "reality" TV craze. Or maybe it's because we all are really just looking for ways that we all connect. Ways that we are the same. Rather than different. Whatever it is, the connection that blogging provides, in my mind, is lovely.

And this leads me into the topic of the Third Shift that Aimee discussed. First off, let me just say that I am totally jealous that she gets to study this stuff. Maybe one day when my kids are old and able to feed and dress themselves well, I too, may venture out into the world of therapy education. I so appreciated all her thoughts on the Third Shift and how we as women often fall victim to this shift in our psyche around age 12 when we start worrying about what others think. Spending too much time worrying about beauty, and our physical appearances. And listening to our negative selves too much.


And well, if you thought you were going to get a zen, grounded, women's-rights type speech here about how well I've done in my life dismissing these thoughts, then you would be sorely mistaken. I hate to admit it, but I too have fallen victim to the Third Shift. It seems, over and over, too many times. I've often heard that once you get into your forties you stop worry about this stuff. And this is one of the reasons I'm looking forward to my forties.


But these thoughts made me think about this awesome book I just read by John Bradshaw titled "Healing The Shame That Binds You." And although it sounds like a snoozer, it actually is really interesting. The book discusses the ways in which we as people go from feeling guilty to shameful. And how some of us can't get past the shame we have felt in our lives and internalize it into toxic shame leading us to act out in addictive and compulsive manners. And even sometimes, develop a totally false self to cover up our shame. Sounds exciting right? But really, I think so many of us out there wallow in self-pity and shame.

Bradshaw says, "In itself, shame is not bad. . . Shame is the emotion that gives us permission to be human. Shame tells us of our limits. Shame keeps us in our human boundaries, letting us know we can and will make mistakes and that we need help. Our shame tells us we are not God. Healthy shame is the psychological foundation of humility. It is the source of spirituality." He goes on, "What I discovered was that shame as a healthy human emotion can be transformed into shame as a state of being. As a state of being shame takes over one's whole identity. To have shame as an identity is to believe that one's being is flawed, that one is defective as a human being. Once shame is transformed into an identity, it becomes toxic and dehumanizing."

So, maybe those of us that have this problem with the Third Shift are just feeling shameful about ourselves. And hopefully it's not toxic in nature, but my instinct is that probably too many people, and especially women, are walking around carrying loads of toxic shame. They feel shameful about everything. Bradshaw talks about the ways in which we hide our toxic shame, ways to uncover it, and later how to recover from it. It has been a most enlightening experience.

Aimee asks on her blog how we balance The Third Shift and how we keep from listening to the negative self talk. Well first, I think we all need to get honest with ourselves and others. And maybe that starts with honesty on our blogs (thanks Kristin), or maybe not. Maybe it means getting honest with a therapist or sponsor. Next, I think we need to spend more time being gentle to ourselves. Loving who we are. Now, let me say, I am so not good at this. But, I wish I was. Bradshaw says, "Giving and receiving unconditional love is the most effective and powerful way to personal wholeness and happiness." And who doesn't want that, eh?


So, I hope that I haven't thoroughly confused you now. If I have, go read Aimee's post and Kristin's post, let it simmer, then let's discuss. Cause, really, it's one of the most fantastic things about blogging. Sharing your thoughts about other's posts. At least it is mine.

Thanks girls for your inspiration! And for those of you still with me, congratulations.

NOT EXACTLY AN APOLOGY

Potty training is an ongoing thing in our house. And this is a little conversation we had after Thing 2 did her business this evening before bedtime.

Me: Yay! Poops in the potty! (Really, does she still believe my fake excitement?)

Her: Woo hoo! I did poops.

Me: Yay! Poops in the potty! (It was late, and frankly it's hard to be excited about feeces.)

Her: I want to flush.

Me: Let me pour it in fi(Wack!)rst. Owwwww! (As my hand got slammed by the lid).

Me: That hurt mommy. What do you say?

Her: Your welcome.




Classic. The joys of motherhood.

JUST ONE MORE THING . . .

GO ALI!

DOOCE.COM

So, my sweet Hubs. He must think I'm very uninformed, because it seems one of his most favorite pastimes is sending me articles via e-mail from the local newspapers. And I appreciate this, because he keeps me up-to-date on all the local happenings of SLC. (It's not that I'm anti-local paper, it's just that I prefer my news come from a larger source--msn for instance).

But his latest article has me grinning from ear to ear. You can check it out here. Now, I'm sure I am one of the very last people on the planet to ear about Dooce.com. But thank goodness I finally have. The author is a local (sort of. Born and raised in the south a Mormon. No longer a practicing Mormon, but now lives in SLC with her Hubby, daughter and two dogs.) mommy blogger with just about the funniest sense of humor ever. Now, be warned. She is very crass, at times shocking, and somewhat, er pretty anti-Mormon, but her posts and pictures are most delightful. And I'm afraid dooce.com just might be my new Diet Coke with caffeine.

Plus it's fun to read up on someone else's view of life as a mom in SLC. And, I'm not the only one who thinks so, since she averages 2 million hits on her site a month. So, if you want, you can check her out here. Or don't. But if you do, don't say I didn't warn you.

TUESDAY'S TIP vapo rub

Hooray, for my very first Tuesday's Tip featuring Mary Jo. Welcome, to the awesome-ness that is Mary Jo.



Disclaimer: I HAVE NOT TRIED THIS. I DON'T EVEN OWN VAPORUB. USE AT OWN RISK.

I was raised, and raised my kids with Vicks. How come I never knew this? I can't wait for my next cough. Amazing! READ IT ALL. It works 100 percent of the time, although the scientists at the Canada Research Council (who discovered it) aren't sure why.

To stop nighttime coughing in a child (or an adult, as we found out personally), put Vicks Vapor Rub generously on the bottom of the feet at bedtime and then cover with socks. Even persistent, heavy, deep coughing will stop in about five minutes and stay stopped for many, many hours of relief. This works 100 percent of the time and is more effective in children than even very strong prescription cough medicines.

In addition, it is extremely soothing and comforting and they will sleep soundly. I heard the head of the Canada Research Council describe these findings on the part of their scientists when they were investigating the effectiveness and usage of prescription cough medicines in children as compared to alternative therapies like acupressure. I just happened to tune in to an AM Radio and picked up this guy talking about why! Cough medicines in kids often do more harm than good due to the chemical make up of these strong drugs, so I listened. It was a surprising finding and found to be more effective than prescribed medicines for children at bedtime and in addition to have a soothing and calming effect on sick children who then went on to sleep soundly. My wife tried it on herself when she had a very deep constant and persistent cough a few weeks ago and it worked 100 percent! She said it felt like a warm blanket had enveloped her. The coughing stopped in a few minutes, and believe me, this was a deep (incredibly annoying!), every few seconds, uncontrollable cough, and she slept cough-free for hours every night she used it.

If you have grandchildren, pass it on. If you end up sick, try it yourself and you will be absolutely amazed by the effect.

THE SMELL OF CHILDHOOD

Today I smelled something that made my heart go pitter patter. It is the sort of smell I wish I could bottle up and keep forever. What is it you ask?


Little Boy Sweat.


It is the perfect combination of Three-year-old fun, suave shampoo, sunshine, and dirt.



Hello Summer.

REFLECTIONS ON EASTER

Now, I realize I'm a bit late for this topic. But I'd like to discuss if I may for a minute, the insanity that Easter is turning into. It saddens me to say this, as it makes me sound like an adult, but. . . .

Is Easter the New Christmas?

And by that I mean, the commercialized Christmas. Santa. Stockings. Vixen, Comet, Cupid. It's all a little much,, don't you think? You completely loose the spirit of the season with all the lights and commercialism.

And well, frankly, I felt like Easter this year was heading in the same direction. I'm not sure if it's cause now more people are blogging than a few years ago when I started, but as I perused the blogisphere post-Easter I was amazed at some of the Easter baskets that people had posted.

I mean really. The vast amounts of candy and chocolate are expected. But all the toys and gifts in the baskets? I don't know what bunny visited you all as kids, but mine left mostly chocolate bunnies, jelly beans and a peanut butter egg or two. But now. Wow. I was absolutely overtaken by all the toys and games and gifts spilling out of the baskets.

Now, don't get me wrong, as a kid I would have LOVED that. But really. I mean, when is enough enough? And when is a religious holiday---religious?

Truth be told, I did get each of my kids one toy from Mr. Bunny but both were under $5. I mean, at first I thought, "Wow. I need to step up my game. My poor kids got nothing from the bunny." But then after some thought, it really started to bug me. All those other baskets. Overflowing. Was I jealous? Am I a crappy mom?

No. I think what it is really, is this strong pull I feel in my life to simplify, condense, and eliminate. (Just ask Hubs.) Sometimes I just feel overwhelmed by stuff. And scared frankly, at the need we feel as parents to get and give our kids stuff. Is it really necessary to be giving our kids this much crap? In our warped society does stuff equal love?

Is this a bit too deep for a monday? Discuss.

JUST CALL ME MOM OF THE YEAR

Is it scary that I let my kids watch this?

Please don't report me to the authorities.

I LOVE LOSERS

Hi everyone!

If you guys are anything like me, you are a sucker for a good weight-loss story. And what weight-loss story is better than The Biggest Loser? I have to admit I have been deliciously enjoying each season of The Biggest Loser since it began. And this season is no different. (On a side note though I really, really, really hated the other girl trainer last season, and missed Jillian during season 3 and therefore, am glad she is back. Although, if we are speaking trainers, I'd much rather discuss Bob. But that is a whole nother post my friends.)

Okay, so how much did you love the last episode? It was grand. Just grand. I love seeing all the contestants widdle down and reach their personal goals. It's super-duper inspiring. But what I really loved about this episode was the fact that both of the girls rocked it, and are definetly in the finale! The boys however, is another story.

Ali--before & after

Kelly--Before and after

Okay, so like every season there is always a twist. And this season is no different. The twist this season is that instead of the girls deciding who gets to go home. America gets to decide. And although I was just skipping on the inside as I was voting here, I really just hated that when finally the girls have a chance at winning (and therefore eliminating Roger) The Biggest Loser goes and screws everything over. If they would have just kept things the same, the top two (Ali & Kelly) would have been able to vote off whoever they would like. This most likely would have been Roger since he has the most weight to lose, and would be the for sure winner.

So, here is my plea. Even if you don't watch, you've gotta get yourself over HERE and vote! And more specifically, vote for Mark. Although I don't want him to win (cause I think he is just a bit too emotional, which is expected, but still bugs me.), I definetly don't want to see Roger in the finals to screw it up for the girls. It really is time for the winner of The Biggest Loser to be a girl. Woo Hoo!

Mark--before & after

Roger--before & after

Okay, so I know you are all

a) way sad for me, that I am so excited about a TV show. But those of you who read regularly know of my love for "reality" TV.

b) already back from voting for Mark. You aren't? Then get on over there!

and c) are dying to know who I want to take it all.

So, I will tell you. I really want Ali to win. Why you ask?

Well, just look at her? She just rocks. And this girl lost MOST of her weight OFF campus. Thats right. She lost it Jillian-free. Which just means she will be able to continue keeping it off in the future. Plus, she is just so cute, and female. Which is awesome. And to be honest, I just really don't like Kelly. She is just a bit too, um, how do I say this? Whiney? Like she doesn't really ever want to be there. She always gives up first, comes in last in the challenges, and well, let see, she was married to that LOSER (Paul) of a guy that she came on the show with. And I just didn't like him, or his mustache.

So, now that you've heard (too much) from me, I'd love to hear from you. Who do you want to see as the third member of the finale? And then who would you like to see win it all? Please vote to the right top. And more importantly,

VOTE FOR MARK HERE. Which is really just a vote for Ali or Kelly. GO NOW!

And as for the at-home Biggest Loser, my prediction is going to be for DAN! I just loved that kid. Too funny. Go Dan!

TUESDAY'S TIP hugs & bugs

Today's Tip: My beloved neighborhood botique HUGS & BUGS is sadly closing it's doors for good this Saturday. The good news is, if you go in now through Saturday almost everything in the store is 50-75% off. Hurry in, cause all the good finds are going fast. Cute new and consignment baby and children's clothing, toys and accessories ALL on sale! I'm sad to see her closing up shop, but she reassures me that they aren't down and out for good just yet. She is going to wait until she finds the perfect location and re-open (hopefully) later this year. But stop in while you can and take advantage of the super low prices.



On a side note, this weekly tip was inspired by the cutest lady just about ever in my neighborhood. She e-mails me the silliest/craziest/ and at times useful forwards and tips almost daily. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with the vast amounts of information I get from her, but now I can just share it here with you. And no, my first tip did not come from my neighbor, but next week's will, and you will just have to wait until then for the awesome-ness that is Mary Jo. Till then!

BUSINESS TIME

No, not that kind of business time. I don't even have socks on.

Okay, so I have a few items of boring business to discuss.

First off, I took the good advice from many of you and went ahead and signed up for Winder Dairy. I am really excited and looking forward to Monday when we get our first delivery. Thanks for everyone who commented. I really appreciate it, and good milk.


Secondly, If any of you know someone out there looking for a good job, I know a lady that is looking for a nanny. You can live in our out. Two kids 3 and 18 months. 8-6 M-F. Let me know if you or anyone you know is interested.


Thirdly, is this the most boring post in Naptime's history? I am sure it is. But alas, on with the business.


Fourthly. Many of you who are readers of this blog know who I am. Not just the fluff that this blog is made of, but like the real goods. Like my name and address and shoe size. You know, the important stuff. But the thing is, I would like to keep those things to myself. So, if you are a reader of this blog and you have me linked to yours---which I hope you all do, can I please ask that in the link you either put Amy R. or even better yet, Naptime Nostalgia? I just want this blog to be totally and completely annonymous. This way I am freed up to tell you about the uber-embarassing and often times mortifying things that happen to me without it coming back to haunt me someday. And I can tell you about all my illegal goings-on. Hee hee.

And if you have my other blog linked to yours feel free to put my full name, shoe size and anything else you want, since that blog is private. And if you are a reader of this blog and want access to my other blog, just leave me a comment with your e-mail and I will add you to my reader list. But fair warning, it's not nearly as fun as this one. Just pictures and videos of Thing 1 and Thing 2. Oh, and hubs.


Fifthly, How much did you love that President Bush got booed as he threw out the first pitch of the nationals game a few days ago? 28,000 fans expressing their feelings. Love it.


Sixthly, Stacie S., I hope you get your mac on this weekend.


I think this is all the business I can handle for one day.


Comming Next Week on Naptime: A new weekly series: Tuesday's Tip, Reflections On Easter, and Riveting Redbox Reviews. Till then!

WANTED: A WELL-BEHAVED THREE-YEAR OLD

Is you life boring? Hours upon hours in a cubicle? Are you in need of a little excitement in your life? If so, then you may borrow my three year-old any day any time.

Today started off innocently enough. Came home from my run, Thing 1 was already dressed (in his swimsuit) and asking what we were going to do today.

My answer: Not go swimming if that's what you're getting at.

But, I decided since we didn't have anything else going on, and I'm still on a budget trying to save money, and I already have a membership to The Children's Museum I decided to head on down there.

This made Thing 1 grin from ear to ear. And Thing 2, mostly cause Thing 1 was. Monkey see, monkey do. We get there and all is going well for like thirty seconds and then, not one, but TWO school field trip groups descended upon us. I literally could not see my children in the sea of kids. It was ridiculous. I hate it when there are field trips there. It's like a zoo. Too many kids there to really have enough toys for everyone (which just means fights and tears), and plus the kids think it's like Christmas to be on a field trip instead of at school, so they act like hooligans. It's not my idea of fun. You should have seen all the non-field trip kids scatter in fear.

Okay, but that is a rant for another day.

After a fun morning playing we decided to head over to Costa Vida for lunch. Kinda like a reward lunch. For me not losing my kids while we were there. (joke people) Now is it just me, or do the lines at Costa Vida crawl? Soooo slow. And you can't blame it on the type of food, cause I don't seem to have that problem at Rio. So anyways, after a much too-long wait in line for lunch, we sit down to eat. Thing 2 spills an entire root beer all over her. Thing 1 burns his mouth on the beans--that, were in his defense, freaking hot. But this is not the end people. No, the craziness has yet to even begin. As the kids are finishing up, I tell Thing 1 to get his coat on while I clean up Thing 2.

Was this my mistake? Asking him to get his coat?

Next thing I know the fire alarm is going off. Flashing lights, blaring sirens, and chaos. Pretty much the things heart attacks are made of. People including me, kinda start freaking out and looking around for direction as to what to do. I look over, and Thing 1 is standing in front of the fire alarm smiling.

Ooooohhh that little rat. I run over push it back up, start apologizing up the wazoo for my little trouble maker. The security people come, finally--seemed like forever, quite a scene now, and shut of the blaring alarm and flashing lights. I'm looking around to make sure we haven't forgot something or someone in all the shuffle and people are giving me really mean you-ruined-my-lunch-now-I'm-annoyed type looks.

Except for one cute mom who just smiled and winked. Not sure what I woulda done to Thing 1 without that wink. Saved his life, and mine.

Walking out after our disaster Thing 1 asks, "Are you mad mom?"

Well, to be honest I was kinda mad. And embarrassed. And mortified. But we had a good long conversation on the way home about being mad, what embarrassed means. What fire is. Why we have fire alarms. Who should pull them, and who should NOT pull them.

Pretty informative.

So, if you are in need of some excitement in your life, again, my three-year old is always available. And if you decide you do, don't say I didn't warn you.